Blackmoor Vituperative

This is the first of a new thing I am doing: tips for young people from an old man. Today’s topic: condoms.

In movies, you often see people get into bed and the guy immediately starts fumbling with the condom wrapper. There are two problems with this.

First, practice opening a condom wrapper and putting on a condom. They aren’t expensive, and you can afford to waste a half-dozen. Figure out what to do with the thing when you don’t have someone naked waiting for you.

Second, when you first get undressed is not the time to put on a condom. Women don’t warm up as quickly as men do. I am assuming the person next to you is a woman, but even men take some time to warm up — and women take longer (15 to 20 minutes is not unusual). So fool around for a while until the other person is thoroughly warmed up (that’s called “foreplay”). Only when you are both ready for penetration do you pause to put on the condom.

As for foreplay, Google that term, and read up about it. It’s not hard to do well, but it’s very easy to do poorly. Pay attention to what the other person wants. Ask them from time to time if what you are doing is working for them, and pay attention to what they say and how they respond. As a guy — particularly a young guy — if you pay attention to the other person, and are good at foreplay, you will be a much better lover than most people.

Be accepting, patient, and kind. Good advice any day of the year. I do not follow it as closely as I would like.